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  CHRIS DALE'S METAL MELTDOWN
MORALLY WORRYING SESSION
November 2012


chris dale



As a session player the idea is that you don't judge the music or its motives. You just play your part, get paid and go home. They haven't hired you to critique their work or to insult them. Sometimes it's really difficult to bite your tongue though.

Sometimes your conscience just doesn't sit right with a song for whatever reason.

I'm a rock/Metal bass player. I don't do a lot of session work, probably because I am a rock/Metal bass player. People usually know what they're going to get when they call me. I don't play jazz or pop or any of those new fangled types of music. I play rock.

So I was quite surprised when I got a call from a music publisher who was doing a new project with some pop songwriters and producers. They'd 'worked with the Spice Girls and stuff' I was told.

Oh great, I thought.

They were doing a theme song for the pitiful England World Cup effort in 2002. It was going to be released as a single and used on a David Beckham computer game.

Yeah, so why had they called me of all people?

And more importantly was it morally right, me doing this kind of thing? Wasn't it like joining the opposition? Could I be done for treason if this was wartime?

It was a worry, but it was also a very well paid worry. So when they mentioned the fee involved I just said yes straight away and took my bass down to the studio.

And a very nice studio it was too. Olympic Studios in Barnes where Queen, Hendrix, the Stones and Led Zeppelin all recorded. The song's writers were there, Robert Davies and Rick Forster, as was the producer Wayne Wilkins.

They are all seriously talented folk, at the top of their game. Wayne was recently responsible for writing and producing that appalling Cheryl Cole 'Fight for Your Love' nonsense. Appalling nonsense it may be but it's also hideously catchy and a massive seller. There's a skill in being able to come up with that kind of thing no matter how un-Metal it may be.

Obviously looking back on it I somehow blame myself for not intervening in some way. Perhaps, if that day I'd only given him a copy of Anthrax's 'Sound Of White Noise' that day things might have been different? There's nothing I can do now but could I have spared the world Cheryl's later musical self-immolation?

Hindsight is a terrible thing, they say and that knowledge doesn't always set me sleeping right at night.

But back on that fateful day in the studio all seemed fine. Talented they all were and very friendly too. Quite a laugh actually. I forgot about the crime I was about to commit.

I got my bass out - this was the moment of truth. It's a Warwick covered in beer bottle labels and burn marks that I've never remembered the exact cause of.

"Cool", they said in unison. "What we're looking for is someone to add some rock to the track."

Phew!

It could have gone either way then. If they had said any other word than "rock" just then the session would have been over.

It turned out they'd had a bassist in before who'd done some melodic stuff they liked but they now wanted to try the same ideas with a different vibe. I gave them the rock vibe.

As it happened they got another guy in after me for another vibe and blended us all together. It was an expensive bass track for them, but I can still hear some of my funny flukey notes in the middle section. Haha, that's me!

FC Allstars: 'Football Is Life': (that's not me in the video!)



We banged through the track. I wished I'd brought my RAT pedal. But still in the back of my mind there was that nagging feeling of betrayal. I got a bit nervous, my palms were sweating and that's not good while playing bass.

It was eventually too much for me and I stopped mid-song.

"Do you mind if I ask..." I asked, but I really wasn't supposed to ask.

"Are you football fans?"

The one songwriter, I can't remember which, said: "Yeah, I've got a season ticket at..." and he named some London club.

As soon as someone talks about football I instantly forget their name, face and what they're saying. This happens mid-sentence with me and can be really embarrassing in social settings.

The other writer looked at his feet and said he wasn't really a fan. He just wrote good melodies.

That was such a relief to hear! I could open up about my fears to these people.

"I'm not going to get credited on this am I?" I asked.

Session players often don't get credited on records. They don't have egos. They don't need credits.

"Err... we're not sure", they said, looking at each other awkwardly. I really wasn't supposed to ask this.

"That's fine by me", I said. "I'd rather not have my name on there if that's OK?"

They looked puzzled so I came clean and told them all my worries.

"No offence lads, but I'm not an England football fan. I'm a Welsh Rugby Union fan. I'm from Lampeter in West Wales and if I was ever associated with an England football hit single, well my name word be dirt.

"I could never go home. My life wouldn't be worth living. I'd have to wander the wastelands for all eternity."

Bless them, they fully sympathised and patted me on the back.

The good lads assured me of complete anonymity in the matter.

That said, I finished the track and took my thirty pieces of silver down the pub in time for last orders.

In the end there was some confusion over the release and England's early exit from the 2002 World Cup.

I recently noticed the same version was re-released for England's equally poor Euro Cup bid this year.

Better luck next time England but I'd rather have been playing bass on this song any day...

Max Boyce: 'Hymns And Arias'






PREVIOUS CHRIS DALE COLUMNS

chris dale 1066 AND HOW THE NORMAN INVASION OF ENGLAND SHAPED HEAVY METAL
These invaders that King Arthur and his brave Knights of the Round Table fought against were the Anglo-Saxons - yes, the English!

September 2016

chris dale 'KISS ROCKS VEGAS LIVE' CD AND DVD
In case you hadn't guessed from some of my previous articles, I'm a massive life-long Kiss fan...

March 2016

chris dale EU REFERENDUM FROM A HEAVY METAL PERSPECTIVE, TAKING THE SWISS EXAMPLE
For some bands the UK will, like Switzerland, simply not be worth the hassle in future...

March 2016

chris dale UNDISCOVERED KISSTORY - THE KISS GUITARIST AUDITIONS OF 1982 Part 2
...more juicy tales and a plethora of brand new information.

March 2016

chris dale UNDISCOVERED KISSTORY - THE KISS GUITARIST AUDITIONS OF 1982 Part 1
...and the mystery of who actually played guitar on the Creatures Of The Night album.

January 2016

chris dale BEST NEW UK BAND OF 2016 AND THE PHENOMENON OF BIGFOOT HOAXERS IN NORTH AMERICA
"Something very odd is going on in the forests of North America and it's not Bigfoot."

January 2016

chris dale BRIGITTE SCHÖN: 'BRUCE DICKINSON: INSIGHTS: AN INTERPRETATION OF HIS SOLO ALBUMS
In which our scribe reviews a book where he has more knowledge than most about the subject matter...

December 2015

chris dale THE IRON MAIDEN-GO WEST PARALLEL UNIVERSE THEORY
He said in one diary he had a singer named as "Bruce" noted down, a phone number and next to it he'd written "Too heavy!"

September 2015

chris dale UNDISCOVERED KISSTORY: VINNIE VINCENT'S WARRIOR
The Full Story Of Vinnie Vincent's Awesome Pre-Kiss Band

March 2015

chris dale UNDISCOVERED KISSTORY: THE KISS DRUMMER AUDITIONS OF 1980
How many and which drummers auditioned for KISS when Peter Criss departed the band in 1980?

March 2015

chris dale MATTHEW TRIPPE RIP
Another look at the strange case of the man who would be Nikki Sixx.

March 2015

chris dale KISS – LOVE GUN DELUXE EDITION
In depth review of the re-issue of the classic Kiss album, Love Gun with bonus live tracks and studio outtakes.

November 2014

chris dale MR BIG – KOKO, LONODON
Live review of the opening night of Mr. Big's 2014/15 World Tour.

October 2014

chris dale MR BIG – THE STORIES WE COULD TELL
Review of the new album from Mr. Big.

September 2014

chris dale INTENSIVE BASS COURSE WITH BILLY SHEEHAN
Your humble narrator goes on tour with the legendary Mr. Big / David Lee Roth bassist and picks up some handy tips along the way.

September 2013

chris dale BOOKING AGENTS vs PROMOTERS
Why your favourite band aren't playing in your home town this year and who would win in a hyothetical fight between a promoter and a booking agent.

August 2013

chris dale ROCK AND METAL PUB QUIZ
Your MetalTalk columnist hosts a regular pub quiz on our two favourite topics: rock and metal!

July 2013

chris dale COMMUNICATION TIPS FOR EUROPEAN FESTIVALS
How to learn a foreign language in a single evening with a film, a phrasebook and a few beers!

June 2013

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A tribute to the artist and visionary genius behind the album covers of Pink Floyd, Led Zeppelin, Muse, Rainbow, Thunder, Dream Theater and Helloween and his work on Bruce Dickinson's 'Skunworks' album.

May 2013

chris dale Daily Mail Columnist Sinks To New Low With Anti-Heavy Metal Article
A response to Richard Littlejohn's Attack on Goths, Punks and Heavy Metal fans.

April 2013

chris dale The Future Of Classic Rock Bands
What will happen to bands like Kiss, Rainbow and Van Halen in the next decade? Do you want tickets for AC/DC's 50th Anniversary of the 'Back In Black' Tour?

April 2013

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The fun I had working as an extra on the 'Ava Adore' promotional video and why dog mess should always be avoided.
March 2013

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Good times as a Radio DJ playing my favourite tunes, making mistakes and talking to Queensryche, Dokken and Geezer Butler.
February 2013

chris dale UNDISCOVERED KISSTORY I: An Entire Album Full Of Unrelased Songs
How Kiss could make a great record this year by looking back at their old demos. We get to hear them all here.
January 2013

chris dale Kiss Reformation Magick
How Alex Dickson and I unwittingly caused the Kiss 1996 Reformation during our South American Tour with Bruce Dickinson.

December 2012

chris dale Exclusive Interview With Geoff Tate
Steve Goldby and I get to ask the singer of Queensrÿche all the questions we ever wanted to know the answers to.
November 2012

chris dale Morally Worrying Session
As an occasional bass session musician, at what point does one call the line and say that enough is really enough?
November 2012

chris dale Kiss 'Monster' Review
Thoughts on the lastest Kiss album after hearing it a few times. It is indeed a great album!

October 2012

chris dale The Best Invention Of All Time
Absolute proof that we bass players (including Steve Harris, Billy Sheehan and Bob Daisley) are the best people in the world. Fact!
October 2012

chris dale A Conversation With Rudy Sarzo
My son Archie and I get to ask Rudy Sarzo (legendary bass player for Ozzy Osbourne, Quiet Riot, Whitesnake, Queenryche and Dio) everything we ever wanted to know about Kiss Make Up, Steve Vai and Cuban Politics.
September 2012

chris dale Scream For Me Sarajevo Part 1
The tale of how back in 1994 Bruce Dickinson and his band of merry men (including myself) found ourselves on our way to the besieged city of Sarajevo in the midst of the Bosnian War.
June 2012

chris dale Scream For Me Sarajevo Part 2
The second part of the story, telling of the practicalities of playing a heavy metal gig in a besieged city.
July 2012

chris dale Scream For Me Sarajevo Part 3
Our journey home from war-torn Sarajevo and refelctions on the long term effects of war.
August 2012

chris dale Managers v Producers
Why do bands need managers and producers and more importantly who would win in a hypothecial fight between the two?
May 2012

chris dale Kiss 'Monster' Album Preview
Predictions of what the upcoming Kiss album may sound like. I think it's going to be pretty good!
April 2012

chris dale London Venue's Nazi Past?
For years I'd heard rumours of the Kentish Town HMV Forum being a former Fascist or Nazi venue. One day I decided to research it more closely to find its true dark past.
March 2012

chris dale How Not to Join the Ozzy Osbourne Band
The time that just for a second, I thought I might be the new bass player for Ozzy Osbourne.
Feburary 2012

chris dale Metal Evilution
Theories about the orgins of Heavy Metal from Creationists and Evolutionists put to the test in a study of the recordings of Def Leppard and AC/DC by producer Mutt Lange
January 2012

chris dale Take Your Pick Competition
This was a competition but still have a look at my cool collection of guitar picks from the last century! Can you guess the original owners? Here's a clue, there's some Dokken, Dio and Kiss in there.
December 2011

chris dale The Pandora's Box Of Pop
What do you do if Banarama offer you their backing vocals for a heavy metal session?
November 2011

chris dale Tank Tour Diary
The Tank Tour of Scandinavaia and Poland including our show supportting Judas Priest.
October 2011

chris dale Festival Stage Collapses
What caused the tragedies at 2011's Ottawa Bluesfest, Indiana State Fair in Indianapolis and the Pukkelpop Festival in Belgium?
September 2011

chris dale Bruce Air, The Early Days
Recollections of flying across the American Mid West on Bruce Dickinson's ''Balls To Picasso' US Tour in 1994.
August 2011

chris dale European Festival Round-Up
My reviews of the best bands while I was with Mr Big on the European Festival circuit this year, including Twisted Sister, Whitesnake and Judas Priest.
July 2011

chris dale Who's Your Favourite Ozzy Guitarist?
Let's compare live clips of Rhandy, Jake, Zakk and all the other guys who have played lead guitar for the Ozzy Osbourne band. Who do you think is really the best?
June 2011

chris dale Bernie Torme Proud To Be Part Of MT Ozzy Article
Former Ozzy Osbourne and Gillan guitarist gives his repsonse to our thoughts on Ozzy Osbourne's various guitarists before and since him.
June 2011

chris dale Japanese Tsunami Disaster
How Japan coped in the wake of the earthquake/tsrunami/nuclear disaster of 2011 seen from the view of a roady on the Mr Big Tour shortly after the events.
May 2011

chris dale 10,000 Tank Albums!
How us having ten thousand listeners might well be the end of the music industry as we once knew it.
April 2011

chris dale Death Metal Session
Recording death metal for polite customers with Mikee Goodman from Sikth and Jay Graham from Ravens Creed.
March 2011

chris dale RIP Gary Moore
My happy recollections of the late great Gary Moore (4th April 1952 - 6th February 2011). A legend and a good guy to laugh with.
February 2011

chris dale Recording Bass at Steve Harris' House
The tale of how we recorded the bass tracks for the Tank album ' War Machine' at Iron Maiden HQ!
February 2011

chris dale A Column About Columns
How I got asked to write columns for MetalTalk by editor Steve Goldby and how I got it wrong from the very start.
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The Exhibition offers a unique insight into a group of world-class musicians who have always defied artistic boundaries...

ac dc phil rudd UK EXCLUSIVE: AC/DC'S PHIL RUDD SUFFERED A HEART ATTACK BUT IS NOW READY TO ROCK AGAIN. BUT NOT WITH AXL
"I sneaked out to the shop to get some cigarettes, then I realised I had no car, so I walked home to get the Ferrari, and drove back to the hospital..."

bloodstock BLOODSTOCK 2017 IS GO! DISCOUNTED EARLY BIRD TICKETS ON SALE HERE NOW
This price will not be available for long so grab your now before they sell out...

clutch CLUTCH DECEMBER UK HEADLINE DATES ARE HERE
A sure fire way to brighten up your holiday season, Clutch will be bringing the festive cheer to four UK cities...

sos festival SOS FESTIVAL ANNOUNCES FIRST NINE BANDS FOR ITS' 10TH EDITION IN 2017
"It's great for us that another Manchester band has the kudos to headline, just as Absolva did us proud on our Friday in 2016..."

tyr TÝR EUROPEAN TOUR UNDER THREAT OVER WHALE CONTROVERSY
Animal rights sympathisers, supporters and activists are in overdrive over this one with some pretty nasty comments being directed towards Heri and the band...

fm FM ANNOUNCE 'INDISCREET 30' NEW ALBUM AND UK TOUR DATES
"We have been asked many times if we would consider re-recording some of these tracks using today's modern technology..."

red hot chili peppers WAS BREAKING NEWS: RED HOT CHILI PEPPERS ANNOUNCE FIRST UK TOUR FOR FIVE YEARS
This exciting run kicks off with two nights at London's O2 on 5th and 6th December and takes in dates in Glasgow, Birmingham and Manchester...

motorhead MOTÖRHEAD IMMORTALISED IN WEST HOLLYWOOD AS THE IRON MAIDENS HEAD STAR-STUDDED ULTIMATE JAM
"I think it looks a lot like him. It's a compelling image. I think it will offer some closure. I think Lemmy is finally home."

korn KORN UNVEIL NEW VIDEO FOR 'INSANE': DON'T TRY THIS AT HOME
'Insane' appears on Korn's latest and twelfth studio album 'The Serenity Of Suffering' which you can pre-order here...

status quo STATUS QUO REVEAL ARTWORK AND TRACKLISTING FOR 'AQUOSTIC II - THAT'S A FACT!'
This is the sound of a band living in the present, embracing the future, whilst cherishing their past...

bruce dickinson EXCLUSIVE: SCREAM FOR ME SARAJEVO FEATURING BRUCE DICKINSON SCOOPS SARAJEVO FILM FESTIVAL AWARDS
The audience surveyed rated the film 4.98 out of a total of 5.00 while Al Jazeera awarded it the Best Documentary out of twenty two entrants...

wakrat WATCH RAGE AGAINST THE MACHINE'S TIM COMMERFORD START NEW NATION IN PARLIAMENT SQUARE ON VIDEO HERE
"The current system is oppressive and elitist, promoting racist ideologies in order to push a self-serving agenda..."

led zeppelin LED ZEPPELIN GIVE YOU AN INSIDE LOOK AT 'THE COMPLETE BBC SESSIONS' SUPER DELUXE
Musical highlights on this new collection include the debut of a long-lost radio session that has achieved near-mythic status among fans...

saxon SAXON PRESENT A HOARD OF LIVE GLORY IN A BOX OF VINYL GOLD
"This is not going to be around again and with exclusive art work too. Bring it on - I think we'll play some of these tracks on tour in the Autumn."

journey toto JOURNEY AND TOTO LIVE SPECTACULARS ON THE WAY IN SEPTEMBER
"When I first listened back, the thought omnipresent in my mind was simply, 'That's that raw, sizzling energy we had in high school!'"

titanfest SKYCLAD, OLIVER/DAWSON SAXON AND MORE ANNOUNCED FOR TITANFEST
It's the 30th anniversary of Onslaught's 'The Force' and they requested that Titanfest be scheduled for November so that the album could be celebrated in style.

geoff tate GEOFF TATE'S OPERATION MINDCRIME UNVEIL TWO NEW TRACKS
"With the key finally in his possession, "H" has everything he needs to finally launch his long awaited project called The New Reality. Or does he..."

big country BIG COUNTRY HEADING OUT ON 'THE SEER' 30th ANNIVERSARY TOUR
Big Country will be performing 'The Seer' in its entirety when tbey hit the road for a 24-date UK tour starting on September 14th...

metallica UK EXCLUSIVE: METALLICA RELEASE 'HARDWIRED' - NEW VIDEO RIGHT HERE
"Has it really been eight years? Doesn't feel like it! We’re obviously beyond psyched to share new tunes with all our friends out there via MetalTalk...

manowar WAS BREAKING NEWS: MANOWAR TICKETS ON SALE FOR THE FINAL BATTLE WORLD TOUR
The Kings Of Metal are abdicating and our very last Call To Arms is coming...

opeth OPETH DETAIL WEMBLEY ARENA SHOW
"We'll only play this set list three times on the whole world tour so if you miss it, you'll have missed it..."

tank UPDATED: TANK RELEASE DIGITAL DELUXE VERSIONS OF 'WAR MACHINE' AND 'WAR NATION'
"Doogies vocals were exactly suited to this period of Tank and we're extremely proud of what we created in these two albums."

pete way PETE WAY LEAVES HOSPITAL AFTER HEART ATTACK
"Pete Way and I would like to thank you all for your messages, kind thoughts and prayers..."

vader WAS BREAKING NEWS: VADER ANNOUNCE NOVEMBER LONDON GIG
Vader will be touring in support of their recently announced new studio album 'The Empire' which is due for release this autumn...

dead daisies THE DEAD DAISIES RELEASE NEW VIDEO FOR 'JOIN TOGETHER' AS 'MAKE SOME NOISE' CRASHES INTO WORLDWIDE CHARTS
"We want to thank all of our fans and friends around the world for the amazing support of our new record 'Make Some Noise'!"

bloodstock POLICE APPEAL FOR INFORMATION REGARDING SEXUAL ASSAULT AT BLOODSTOCK
"Police are appealing for anyone with information to get in touch and are asking people to share this appeal..."

guns n roses EXCLUSIVE: GUNS N' ROSES DOWNLOAD ANNOUNCEMENT ON THE WAY WITH AUSTRALIAN AND JAPANESE DATES CONFIRMED
Other possibles for the remaining two headline slots are Aerosmith, Def Leppard and Metallica...

roger dean URIAH HEEP, BUDGIE AND ATOMIC ROOSTER ARTISTS WORK TO BE IMMORTALISED ON STAMPS
Roger Dean has designed over 100 album covers for artists including Yes, Asia, London Symphony Orchestra, Nightwing, It Bites and Snafu.

evil scarecrow WAS BREAKING NEWS: EVIL SCARECROW ANNOUNCE 'ROCK YOU LIKE A HURRICANADO' TOUR
"We'll be bringing our biggest, silliest show yet along with some brand new, probably never heard before, music 'genius'..."

blaze bayley BLAZE BAYLEY TO BE FEATURED IN MULTI-PART CANADIAN DOCUMENTARY
"I'm excited to be returning to Canada and I look forward to meeting my fans, with the opportunity for them to be a part of the documentary."

last in line LAST IN LINE ADDED TO WINTER STORM LINE-UP
Winter Storm, the festival that will take place over the weekend of 25th and 26th November in Troon, South Ayrshire, have already announced an exciting line-up...

tony iommi GREAT NEWS FROM TONY IOMMI: CANCER IS IN REMISSION
"The chemotherapy and the follow-up treatment appear to have done the trick — but I'm aware that it could come back one day."

suicide silence SUICIDE SILENCE ANNOUNCE NOVEMBER 2016 UK TOUR
"Hold on to your butts cause we will be headbanging our way through your town! Bring your A game cause we will be bringing ours..."

ac dc AC/DC IN FULL FLIGHT: QUALITY LIMITED EDITION BOOK IS A MUST FOR COLLECTORS
All of the photographs have been carefully processed and digitally restored to optimise reproduction quality.

ozzy osbourne BOB DAISLEY FILES LAWSUIT AGAINST OZZY OSBOURNE, WHO RESPONDS
"We would have hoped that after 36 years that Mr Daisley would have lost his unhealthy personal obsession and resentment towards Mr Osbourne's success."

70 tons of metal 70000 TONS OF METAL: SIXTY BANDS, BARS THAT NEVER CLOSE AND MUCH MORE
Heavy Metal bands from around the globe playing concerts on four different stages...

lamb of god WAS BREAKING NEWS: LAMB OF GOD REVEAL NEW MUSIC VIDEO FOR 'EMBERS': MARK MORTON HAS SOME DEEPLY PERSONAL WORDS
"Nearly a decade after 'Walk With Me In Hell' it was happening yet again. Art was imitating life..."

iron maiden WAS BREAKING NEWS: IRON MAIDEN RELEASE "THANK YOU" VIDEO - WATCH IT HERE
Now it's break time for Iron Maiden but they will be back for a full scale UK Tour in 2017...

meat loaf WAS BREAKING NEWS: MEAT LOAF RELEASES SECOND TRACK FROM FORTHCOMING NEW ALBUM WITH JIM STEINMAN - LISTEN HERE
"Now psychologist and psychiatrists all over America are giving it to their patients..."

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