Ya know I sleep with a porcupine for my pillow, And I'll fight a big ass drunk gorilla,
A mule done kicked me, didn't break my hide, And a rattlesnake bit me, then crawled off an' died....
I'm Phil and I'm old, tired, bad tempered and stuck here in hell's creation because when Jesus moved out of Chicago the fucker left me behind. I have a Peacemaker in one hand, righteous rock 'n' roll scripture in the other, an ass pocket full of whisky and I'm mad as hell about it all. Smell bad too.
Folks down here in the south western badlands like their music sweet an' traditional but I don't 'cos all I like is loud as hell rock 'n' roll. Partial to some seriously jagged assed hillbilly blues picking and slide too.
Now, y'all might be thinking I'm just another drunken country redneck bigot but really I don't care which God you bother or what creed, colour or sex you are. Man, I don't even give a shit about which hole y'all stick yer dicks in. I just hate everybody.
And that's me folks. So here's to your good health and don't forget, keep the faith, your peace and when the snappers come a snappin', your dicks an' tits out of the water. Hell yeah!